Monkey's Uncle
Fun With Genesis Issue, Summer 1985
Editor: E.T. Babinski
THEISTIC EVOLUTION -- AN UNFINISHED SYMPHONY
The cosmic hierarchy I perceive resembles a row of drunken, dancing Russian revellers. Or it resembles the pointlessly abundant yet beautiful filagree lining the margins of medieval manuscripts. Or its like the endlessly extravagant music of Bach. God's play is likewise, splendiforous! And as I gaze at the universe I do not see an ironclad PURPOSEFULNESS clenched tightly between God's teeth, but an utter extravagance of space--God's gracious gratuitous improvisation of immensities! I surmise that God, like most great artists, needed a cosmic-sized loft' in which to loose the reins of His creativity. None of that crowded cluttered desktop appearance that might suggest God was a business executive in a three button suit savagely seeking to increase his net worth...No, He sets off each star like a prime jewel, against infinite yards of black-velvety space.
The Big Bang was a festive firework! Imagine God bellowing, "Everybody stand back! Gimme room! I'm gonna create!" He rolls up His sleeves, and infinite space appears a blank artist's canvas. He points a finger at the center of the canvas and a bright ball of light instantly begins to sparkle there. A few angels fly over to take a peek. 'It's ticking!" they chime. God remains impishly silent. Suddenly, KA BOOM!! The sparkling ball of light discharges into zillions of tiny bits careening all over the canvas. As the sparks settle, God nudges one shoulder towards a rather far off insignificant spark, spinning near the edge of the Wheel of the Milky Way Galaxy. All the angels then bend toward that spark with eager eyes and ears, for it suddenly begins ticking. In only a third of the time it took for the Big Bang to subside, that star flares up: Nine little sparks shoot forth from the sun, and they slowly begin to cool. But now the pace accelerates even more. The third planet is ticking! Suddenly a veritable explosion of life floods the oceans of that tiny planet! (The Cambrian Era!) followed quickly by more explosions, the Devonian, Pennsylvanian, Cretaceous, faster and faster...age of mammals, for ever since the first creative act the pace has been inversely astronomical! Life explodes in profusion upon the earth like kernels of sunripened popcorn.
One day an angel, examining this strange world hears a sound in a tree overhead... a hairy little creature in the tree is ticking! BOOM! Hunters-gatherers, Agriculture, Civilization...then one day a man heard the ticking of the universe in his own heart. He obviously took this as a sign that an imminent explosion was on the horizon. He preached the apocalyptic end of all things, a new heaven, a new earth. "Come closer God! Abba, Father!" he cried. "just a step closer, and the sky will surely tear asunder, the veil of the Temple will be torn in two, and grave stones will be kicked aside like pebbles!" Tick, Tick Tick!
Hammer, hammer, hammer! "Pass me another nail, Cestus, this one didn't go all the way through his feet. (An Unfinished Symphony...)
